Wednesday, 25 December 2013

Merry Christmas, Son. I Trampled a Man To Death To Buy You This LeapPad Ultra Tablet

Merry Christmas, Son. I Trampled a Man To Death To Buy You This LeapPad Ultra Tablet
Dec 25th 2013, 17:00, by Jeremiah Tucker - McSweeneys

Merry Christmas, Son. I Trampled a Man To Death To Buy You This LeapPad Ultra Tablet
I bought this for you weeks ago. Santa Claus got most of your presents, but this one is special from your mom and me. It was very hard keeping it a secret from you. Partly because you're so curious, always getting into everything, and partly because after Daddy bought this present it was the top story on the local news for a week.
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